Why frolic?

I decided to begin my journey as a blogger. I've always wanted to give it a wing but never really had the motivation to until I found out from a very close friend of mine that it can actually be pretty fulfilling so hey, I thought to myself, why not?

I do keep a journal. I've always kept one. I've wrote my thoughts, my dreams, poems, to-do lists, goals, secrets, fears-- just everything. Even daily goals sometimes.

Lately...I've been feeling a hole inside. I've been staring at myself in the mirror looking at this 23-year-old mother who wants to finish school while saving the world. I've been trying on different capes but I just can't find the right color. Haha, In other words... I'm confused about where I'm going in life.

I am very happy I have two young sons. I couldn't be happier about that fact. I'm married, I'm almost a junior at a university majoring in Elementary Special Education. I know I want to help people... I know I want to work with children and their families... I know all that about myself. But what I am confused about is... who am I...really?

Lol, well. I'm thinking writing down all my strewn thoughts will help myself figure that out. And hey, I can always use the thoughts of my peers, my friends, my family.

I apologize ahead of time if this doesn't make sense sometimes. My thoughts-- my thinker is pretty scattered. I got that term from a psychologist I used to see as a teenager. My "thinker" is that voice inside of my head that goes on and on and on...and on. One minute I'm listening to someone talk-- and a nanosecond later I'm wondering if the bananas in the other room are ripe yet.

So, bear with me and maybe help this lady out a little with a comment or two.

Why frolic? I see myself dancing in the rain. Well, that's how I would LIKE to see myself. I want to live that good life without all that nonsense of the world. All those negative things like alcohol, swearing, greed, and all those branches in my path that are saying, hey, you there. Come down this path and you'll have a good time! Or something like that....
I want to just stroll along my path and be the best person I can possibly be. I want to help people; I want to see the glass half full all the time. I also want world peace but hmmmm, i'll take one step at a time.

So, right now. Let's all hold hands and sit around the fire. Chat about recycling and roast some organic marshmallows. They may not be as gooey as the non-organic ones...but hey, I like to know what I eat.